How a parent can ruin a match
Written by Robert Ziegler
April 28, 2008
 

I was back out at soccer fields this weekend for the first time in a while, and had the chance to get reacquainted with the range of sideline behavior among parents at club games.

On Friday at the Blue Chip Showcase I had the misfortune to sit next to a dad who apparently has come under the mistaken notion that he is an extra coach, strategically positioned on the opposite sideline as the real coach. Throughout the match he was shouting  at the players on his son’s team. He wasn’t so much giving advice on what to do as continually telling them what he thought they were doing wrong.

This gentleman also apparently believes his team’s players have the ability to transcend the time/space continuum which confines most of us mortals. I say this because he often would complain loudly that these players were not in one place on the field at the same time they were on another. This (coincidentally I’m sure) often came at times when his own son had sent a long pass several yards away from any of his teammates. As the match went on he became increasingly critical of the players basically for anything that didn’t result in a goal on every attack.

As the match went on it was rather evident the man from Ohio was becoming a distraction to some of the players, who were turning and giving him dirty looks. It is hard enough to play a high-level game and to carry out instructions from a coach, without dealing with a barrage of criticism from one of your own. Of course it is also completely annoying to everyone trying to enjoy what was otherwise a good game of soccer.

So to the gentleman in question – your son plays on a pretty good team and seems to understand tactics fairly well. You on the other hand were wrong with about everything you said, and a complete annoyance to everyone around you. If you cannot help but talk like this during the match, go far enough away from the fields so nobody can hear you, otherwise quit sharing your negative thoughts with everyone, including the players, who don’t answer to you. In short, know your role.

On the other hand, I did manage to co-mingle with many other parents and otherwise fans who were enthusiastic about their teams and expressed it right. I don’t mean someone has to be Pollyannish about these things. It is a spectator sport after all, but you can be supportive, keep perspective AND avoid being counterproductive about these things. That’s what I was glad to see a lot of out on the fields in Cincinnati and Carmel this weekend.

It’s also becoming clear that more and more parents are getting into the game of soccer beyond their own children’s involvement with it. That can only be a good sign.